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    阳光下的泪光

    想呼吸,象二月,三月那样顺畅与自在的呼吸,尤其在此刻接近炽烈的阳光下,“可是”后面的话依旧说不清,当局者迷,应该就是这个意思吧。VIVA FOREVER从前天那个懒洋洋的下午就没有离开过我的耳朵,那是零七年的十月我最钟情的旋律。那个月的某个星期,我在北京,和夏竹不声不响的去爬香山,躲过人潮汹涌向着红叶的大道小道,两个丫头进了大门后兴奋的开始着不走寻常路的香山之行,那一天,我们是幸福的,自然带来的真切,自在带来的畅快,友情带来的温暖,甚至叛逆带来的满足充斥着整整一个星期的北京之行。游荡798,霸占吕丹的房子,乱窜小胡同,大街上发呆,一夜未眠的闲扯。是的,零九年的四月我再次触动这个旋律时,我能忆起的,满脑袋想像的,就是当年的一幕幕,不是怀念,没有眷恋,一切自自然然的被当年的旋律拽回到现在的头脑想像中,这样是不是我就可以不用去想去烦现在的生活呢?你真幼稚,你还没长大。

    阳光下的泪光,不知道在不在闪烁。哭了,只因告别。我幸福着,因为我有瓶子,那个承载着我太多状态和情感的瓶子,那是四月十八号之前。之后的几日,你突然发现你的生活中,总是缺少点什么,人真的是需要寄托的,而寄托又真的是需要你邂逅的,恰当的时间,恰当的场景,恰当的心境,不管他是什么,哪怕,只是阳光下的按个摇椅或者流水。我的两个月,有瓶子相伴的两个月过的很踏实,很实在,很真实,也很真诚。不是不需要了,只是,你,已经承载不了这个丫头所有的状态和情感了,与能力无关,与真诚有关。给你,并不想,可是给你了,又怎样呢?

    阳光下,很热,热到,热泪盈眶。你真幼稚,你还没长大,较什么真儿呢。

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